As Seen on Shark Tank

When I run into an idea that is too broad for a single horoscope, I remind myself I have space and place to work it out. The nexus of the connection was borne out of a meditation, someplace between dream-state and reality.

My imagination runs amok.

I’ve seen the sales copy before, “As Seen on Shark Tank” — as good a tag line as any. Then my imagination started to wander.

“Oh Kramer, you shouldn’t let your mind wander without supervision, it might get lost, then what would you think?”

I was supposed to “Take a meeting” with Mark Cuban, back during the heady days of the mid-1990’s, shortly after he’d made a lot of money from the sale of “dot something,” I’m not sure what. I was a big deal at the time, as a fledgeling Austin-based astrology writer, me with nascent, internet-based notoriety. We had yet to dissect the connection between old press and web-savvy.

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I’ve only seen Shark Tank in a few clips, never watched it myself. I understand the premise, though. As a small-business operator myself, I understand the concerns. As an example, I’ve linked to this several times, that original YouTube clip for the little squatty-potty thing? Unicorn on the toilet? Sure, a Shark Tank success story, I suppose. Start with catch and an avenue to make money from that idea. Like the squatty potty? Sell a shitload? It is nothing more than a small, bench that wraps around the toilet. Sold millions, be my guess.

The problem, as I wrestled my way through this material, what would I be pitching? I have one book with a publishing date terminally put off due to the corona, bad stars, and similar concerns. “You’re the astrologer, predict and then pick the perfect dare to launch it yourself.” Yeah, not a lot of this year looks good, in case that’s not clear.

That one book, it’s kind of technical in its nature. It’s good, if one knows how to look up exact astrological transits, like, as companion to an ephemeris. While various data and interpretations are available online, this one is wholly mine. Again, near 25 years in the making. Handy reference, I use myself, but of course I would, I wrote it.

I understand, though, without a deft editorial hand, the introduction and instruction is lost on all but the most devoted and understanding supplicants. So that’s not getting pitched.

A big, expensive marketing push, that would be interesting, but a media campaign in the hundreds of thousands of dollars wouldn’t net a revenue that would show profit. No, that wasn’t the pitch, either.

As Seen on Shark Tank

So there isn’t an As Seen on Shark Tank idea readily available. Maybe a decade back, perhaps further, I was avidly, albeit clandestinely, following much of what Mark Cuban was writing in his proto-blog. It was that early web writing that was neither polished, nor accurate, but certainly evocative and profound. Occasionally, he was also profoundly wrong, but I admire a person who can quickly own up to a mistake.

“Wow, I missed that one.”

The longer discussion is about love of what one is doing rather than doing it for the money alone.

Dozens of years back, I adjusted my approach to make my way of working scalable and sustainable. Or, as this pandemic winds on and on? Sustainable and scalable. The website works with a hundred people or thousands. The effort I put into it? I can maintain this pace.

The problem? There’s nothing to pitch for that label, As Seen on Shark Tank because this isn’t about making the big bucks, this is about loving what I do.

I love my day job. But I can’t pitch it As Seen on Shark Tank.

As Seen on Shark Tank

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